From the moment your parents met, they were inseparable. They used to tell you stories about all the things they used to do together and the places they used to go. But now, their differing care needs are making it harder for them to continue the lifestyle they’ve always enjoyed together. A move for mom is imminent, and dad is beside himself because he may have to live apart from her for the first time in years. What do you do when a situation like this occurs? Do you simply allow your parents to be separated or do you find a solution that can keep them together?
According to Ryan Carney, Executive Director at Travanse Living™ at Wheaton, an Assisted Living and Enlight Memory Care community in Wheaton, IL, it may be in your parent or loved one’s best interest to remain together. “While it’s not often talked about, the separation of couples based on their needs is more common than you think and happens much more often than many would like to admit,” says Ryan. “While moving a loved one to an assisted living community can help them to get the care they need, it can also cause your loved one and their spouse large amounts of stress, which can be detrimental to both of their health.”
After being together for such a long time and building their lives together, the idea of living apart can cause them emotional distress. After all, they promised “in sickness and in health.” In order to make loved ones the healthiest and happiest they can be, it’s important to realize the benefits of keeping them together and discover ways to do so.
The Benefits of Keeping Couples Together in Assisted Living
Before choosing an assisted living community where your loved ones are not able to stay together, think about the numerous advantages of keeping couples together in assisted living.
It strengthens their bond. Not having to move away from each other allows couples to continue growing in their experiences and their relationship.
They get support from each other. By never having to spend a day without their spouse, they are able to communicate and gain strength from each other.
There are plenty of things to do. Couples in assisted living can participate in the community’s programs and events together, allowing them to continue having fun together.
They can each still care for each other. When a spouse has simple needs that don’t need the attention of a nurse, their spouse can still help to care for them, making them feel useful and as though they are helping to keep their loved one happy.
Worries about increased care needs diminish. Many assisted living communities offer different levels of care without ever needing to move, and, if the other spouse begins to need more care, they can still remain together.
They can focus on their relationship again. Without needing to worry about being a full-time caregiver, couples can begin to put their relationship as their main focus again.
Decreases the risk of depression. Separating couples can cause them to both become increasingly depressed and stressed out, which can cause their health to rapidly decline. By moving to an assisted living community together, this risk decreases.
Choosing an Assisted Living Community Where Couples Can Stay Together
When choosing an assisted living community for couples, there are many aspects to think about. Consider some of the following.
Do they both feel at home and love the community? If one of the spouses loves a certain community, but the other does not feel welcome, keep looking at other communities. Make a note about what aspects they both like and what they do not like so that you can choose an assisted living community that will benefit them both.
Will the needs of both individuals be met? Can the assisted living community accommodate both people’s needs? It’s important to see what their care levels include and if they can provide everything your loved one will need to get the best care possible.
How much will moving into assisted living cost? Consider the cost of the community for both of your loved ones to live there. Many times, depending on the care that’s needed, the partner who doesn’t need as much care pays less. Be sure to ask what’s included in the levels of care in order to figure out total cost as care needs increase.
As care needs change, will they need to move? Does the assisted living community allow those with different care needs to live in the same apartment? Or as needs progress, will they need to move to a different area or even a new community altogether? Be sure to ask, as this can cause a distressing situation later on.
Travanse Living™ at Wheaton, Keeping Couples Together & Helping Them Live Uplifted.
At Travanse Living™ at Wheaton, we know how beneficial it is to keep couples together. When they began their journey together, it can mean so much to be able to give them the opportunity to continue it together, just as they would have if they didn’t need extra care. Here, we can accommodate that while providing an uplifting lifestyle that will help to grow their experiences and bring them closer together, both in sickness and in health.
Experience Life. Uplifted! at Travanse Living™ at Wheaton
Travanse Living™ at Wheaton offers Assisted Living and Enlight Memory Care services to individuals in the area. Travanse Living™ communities offer the best of both worlds – the dignity, comfort and peace of private apartment suites as well as spacious and abundant social areas – both inside and outside. Our beautiful communities, rich in care, services and amenities, are complemented by our life-enriching and diverse programming.
Travanse Living is more than a warm, welcoming and supportive place to call home. It is an engaging, worry-free lifestyle for individuals needing senior living services or memory care. After all, while you may need a bit of support to remain living independently, your desire to live a full, active and meaningful lifestyle hasn’t changed one bit.
To ensure quality in every aspect of the community, we turned to Pathway to Living™ to operate and manage Travanse Living. Award-winning VIVA!SM programming by Pathway to Living™ keeps residents active and engaged within our community. We encourage our residents to remain active – physically, intellectually and spiritually – living a life filled with purpose, meaning and fulfillment.